Where do we go from here?
We cannot imagine the heartache and hurt you have gone through to lead you here. Take comfort in knowing there is hope. Everything happens for a reason, and you are here for a reason. Once you have decided surrogacy is the right choice for you, there are several more things that need to be done. Below you will find helpful information and approximate time lines of how this process works. If you would like to speak in detail regarding any of these topics or have any other questions, please contact us below and we would love to help.
Thank you for allowing us to be a part of this chapter of your life. Your Miracle is waiting!
- Please contact us, by using the form below, and we will answer any of your preliminary questions and e-mail you an application for candidacy. We can meet in person or just go over your answers by phone once it is filled out. You will be notified shortly after our meeting if you qualify to be represented by Miracles in the Making.
- Once your profile is complete and candidacy is confirmed, you will be given surrogate profiles to read through. You may review them at your convenience, and the interview process can begin. A three-way phone call, Skype/Facetime or an in person interview will take place. We will discuss timelines, expectations, and just get an overall feeling of partnership. If you feel a connection and want to move forward with a surrogate, the non-refundable portion of the Agency Fee will need to be paid in-full at this time, and the surrogate monthly allowance will begin to retain her services.
- We will contact the lawyer and arrange legal paperwork to begin drafting the contract. If you are currently working with your own legal team, the surrogate's lawyer will coordinate paperwork to facilitate this process. The contract will then be sent to both parties for review and if any negotiations need to happen, we will assist you.
- A psychological evaluation is required for the surrogate, her spouse (if applicable) and the intended parents. We have a psychologist that is familiar with this process and coordinates the reports with the clinic being used. Arrangements will be made with the psychologist to set up an appointment at a convenient time.
- We will assist you in coordinating the surrogate's medical information to your clinic of choice. She will travel to your clinic for the transfer of the embryo(s).
- Once the surrogate is medically cleared to moved forward, then medications can be ordered. If the surrogate is going to do a "fresh cycle", then her cycle will need to be coordinated with the intended mother or egg donor. If you are doing a "frozen cycle", then a date will be set to do the transfer.
- At this time the surrogate and intended parent's will receive a color-coded calendar with daily tasks and things to do for the next several weeks. This is a very exciting time. Seeing something in writing makes everything real!
- The surrogate will begin her medication regime as you prepare for the big day. Transfer is near! You may wish to be here for the transfer, and most clinics are very accommodating to this situation. If all is well, it is time to transfer. This is a very happy, but stressful day. Everyone is thinking, "Will it work?" The procedure happens very quickly and is similar to an annual exam. The embryo(s) will be placed in the surrogate with the use of a tiny catheter guided by an ultrasound. She will rest for 20-30 minutes before being released. Depending on clinic orders, she will be on light to moderate bed rest for 24-72 hours.
- The surrogate will have her blood drawn on day 7-9 and again on day 8-12; again, depending on clinic protocol. These tests are referred to as "betas." These two numbers analyze the amount of beta-hCG (pregnancy hormone) that is present, and if they are within range, she is considered chemically pregnant. This means she has the right amount of hormone present to indicate the embryo(s) have implanted. Another blood draw on around day 20 will further confirm this. If, at any time, the numbers are zero or have declined, she may have lost the pregnancy or the embryo did not attach. All medications will be stopped, and she will wait for it to pass. There are no guarantees that it will work the first, second, or even third time. This is a very sad and frustrating time for everyone, and this is when good communication is critical, both between the surrogate and intended parents and also with the agency. Support, both emotional and physical, can make a devastating situation more bearable.
- If her numbers have gone up the appropriate amount, then a 6-8 week ultrasound will be scheduled to see if, and how many, heartbeats there are. Another very, very exciting day! You may wish to be here if you choose. Skype or FaceTime is also a good alternative if you are unable to attend. Everyone is usually very anxious to see "What's in there!" The surrogate will go to the clinic, and an internal ultrasound will be performed. The technician will measure the tiny baby(ies) and its yolk sac to get an estimated age. If everyone is healthy, then another ultrasound will be scheduled in 2-3 weeks, around 8-10 weeks gestation. This link is very helpful in finding out the due date based on the time of transfer.
- Congratulations! You have made it very far in the process. Next, the surrogate will simply "bake" that baby to perfection and when the time is right, delivery day! This will be one of the most intense, amazing and joyous days of your entire life. Both the surrogate and intended parents will have talked in-depth about expectations of the birth. No one wants any surprises on such a special day. You will have discussed options on a possible induction, or waiting to go naturally, who is going to hold the baby first, cut the cord, etc. The agency would be more than willing to help everyone come to an agreement on all the little details before the "birth" day.
- After the surrogate has an established pregnancy, it is time for you to arrange insurance coverage for your newborn. Some policies take up to 60 days to be enforced so please do not procrastinate. Speak to your employer or research a new policy and have things ready to go when it is time to add the baby onto the plan. The surrogate is not required to have the baby hospital bills be submitted through her insurance. If you have any questions, please ask well in advance, and we would be happy to help.
- The BIG day has arrived! Whether you have already set a day to be induced, scheduled to have a C-Section, or things happened naturally, the baby is coming! Emotions will be high and nerves on edge, but everyone is thrilled to meet this Miracle. Deliveries will happen at the surrogates local hospital where the staff will be made aware of surrogacy arrangements. You will be able to have your family and friends there to support you, and the surrogate may want to have her family and friends present, as well. Both parties need to be respectful of the others wishes. For example, if the surrogate does not want anyone else but her husband and the intended parents in the delivery room, those wants should be taken into consideration. If the intended parents want the new grandparents in the room, those wishes should also be respected. Again, all of this will have been clarified ahead of time.
- After delivery, the baby will either be taken to the nursery or stay in a room with the surrogate (or the parents, if they have their own room in the hospital). Some women choose to have alone time and be in a private room, others choose to have the baby and new mother stay in the same room. It all depends on the situation because each delivery is so different! She will have access to the baby at any time, either in her recovery room or visits to the nursery. The intended parents will be given a wrist band indicating who they are, also giving them access to the baby. The nursery staff will ask that you show identification each time you enter the nursery; it must match the wrist band you were given.
- The surrogate may want to have private time with the baby. Most of the time she will want to hold the baby and say good-bye before being released. Please be respectful of this precious time as she has invested a lot of energy, both physical and emotional, into growing your child. What an amazing thing she has done!
- Don't forget to bring your car seat to the hospital! The baby will need to pass a car seat test before leaving the hospital. Click here for a great list of items to bring with you to the hospital. Some of these items may not be pertinent to your very special and unique situation.
- Before anyone is discharged, you will be asked to put the baby expenses, (nursery fees, immunizations, circumcisions, etc.) in your name through the billing department. You will be the guarantor of any hospital expenses, other than the delivery and room charges for the surrogate. This is a very simple process and will be arranged with the hospital patient coordinator or social services. The hospital bills of the baby will be sent directly to your address.
- If the baby needs to stay in the hospital longer, the surrogate may choose to be discharged and go home, or the baby may be ready to go home before the surrogate. Paperwork and other arrangements will be made on a case-by-case basis.
- Upon discharge, and up to a month ahead of time, you will have filled out preliminary legal paperwork that will be finalized after the birth signifying the surrogate has terminated her maternal rights. These documents state the intended father's name is to be put on the birth certificate, not the surrogate's husband. Social Security cards will have been ordered in the hospital before discharge.
- Once discharged from the hospital, you may choose to stay in a hotel for a few days, or even weeks, before you take the baby home. With the approval of the pediatrician, some parents leave for home the next day.
- In the upcoming weeks, the surrogate will begin receiving hospital, laboratory, and other bills. She can pay directly with a credit card that you have provided, or she can scan, e-mail or mail the bills to you. These will have already been run through her insurance and are due upon receipt. Please pay in a timely manner as it is the good name and credit of the surrogate in jeopardy. If additional funds are available, the medical bills can be paid directly from the escrow account.
- After delivery and once the legal termination paperwork has been submitted to Vital Records, a new birth certificate will be processed, removing the surrogates name and adding the Intended Mother's name on it.
- Last, but certainly not least, enjoy each and every moment you have with your new Miracle! What a gift!
